Living in a Fake Reality
I’m in a weird place right now, but that’s to be expected I guess.
Myself and the other three members of my little family are still battling the flu (this whole Christmas period has been a huge blur, including my birthday 😣); we’re currently feeling the after effects of the energetic shifts brought with the last solar eclipse of the decade; we’re heading right on into a new decade, and obviously my birthday has just passed too and we’re in Capricorn season which has brought major shifts internally for me. There’s a lot happening right now. It’s just… a lot.
I just feel so disconnected from everyone and everything, and feel like I’m trapped in some kind of alternate dimension where everything is just so fake, yet that fakeness is praised and heralded as if it is absolute truth, and given stamp-of-approval after stamp-of-approval through double clicks and gassed up comments – and I feel like I just don’t want to be a part of it anymore.
This year has shown me so much about the broken state of humanity – and I’m not even talking about war and famine and third-world countries. I’m talking about us privileged lot – in our comfortable clothes, in our comfortable homes, with the comfort of our phones and now what seems to be the anchor of our entire existence at the touch of our fingers.
Us lot. The millennials, and beyond.
We are broken.
We don’t know what is real anymore.
We don’t know who we are anymore.
So we carry on playing these games and living out our lives on digital phone screens, leading not just ourselves but our ‘followers’ further down into these dark little rabbit holes that don’t lead to wonderland; rather, rabbit holes that lead to darkness and despair, disguised as tunnels leading towards the light.
Rabbit holes in which we will get lost. Where we are lost. And I feel like if I am the one to say that out loud, then it will be I the one who is labelled as crazy. Isn’t that insanity in itself?
I’ve seen it all this year.
I’ve had someone ask me, before even asking my name, “how many instagram followers do you have?”, completely taking me aback.
I’ve seen firsthand how the social media ‘influencers’ who portray themselves as wonderful, positive, happy people online, in person can be catty, and bitter, and jealous and always trying to get one over on others who they are threatened by.
I’ve seen just how fake people can be to your face – and then something completely different behind your back. It’s scary.
I’ve watched how a little bit of online exposure can make some people completely lose touch with truth; choosing to back up organisations that are covertly funded by a governmental counter-extremism agenda, rather than standing by their own communities, and in turn, actually making their own communities believe that all of the above is actually okay.
I’ve been in a situation at BBC Radio where a young lad who was featuring alongside me, before even getting to know me, asked me what my instagram username was so he could look me up on there – as if deciding through that whether he wanted to know me or not. Someone who seemed so caught up in the online world, he couldn’t even muster up a decent conversation or even have the courtesy to say goodbye as we both left the studio that night. But I guess that’s okay – because he followed me on Instagram, right?
I’ve seen how people can manipulate others so easily – and turn them against others just as easily.
I’ve stood by and watched while people who have so much potential for light to enter them, allow themselves to be led astray by those who are even more lost, broken and confused than them – just so that they are a part of something, and they don’t have to be alone.
I’ve seen how people stage their lives for social media – literally, stage their lives for social media.
I’ve watched people order and pay for beautiful Instagrammable food, only to post pictures of it straight to their Instagram stories and leave 80% of it on the plate.
I don’t get it.
I just don’t get it.
I definitely do feel a positive shift in the collective consciousness, but simultaneously, I feel as if we’re currently also being reminded just how asleep the majority of society still is. And then there’s the parts of society masquerading as being ‘woke’, when that active ‘wokeness’ is still part of the slumber.
Some days I feel like I truly am just trying to battle through the noise, while I try and remind people to return to the truth and silence that lives within them; and although I know the messages reach the right people at the right time, sometimes it can just be so very exhausting. And I guess right now, with the culmination of a number of other things, I’m just feeling drained by it all, especially as I figure out my plans and goals for 2020.
Maybe this post won’t make sense to a lot of people, or maybe it will. But I felt that now, in the time of releasing, was the best time to allow these words to spill forth.
As I always say, the change always has to begin with us. So I will continue to keep working on myself and try my best not to allow the rocky waters of this world and society, to seep into my silent, little boat as it continues to sail forwards – slowly, but surely.
I pray the same for you, and more.
May you always be reminded of what is real – and not allow the illusions of this fake reality we live in today to become your truth.